I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
