Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
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