I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
This can only be settled by a dance off.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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