y did u give ur computer a hand job?
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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