Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Randomize
