I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
