She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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