Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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