North Korea, Best Korea!
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Randomize
