Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
My balls are so social today.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize