Nicole vs. Life
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
