areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Randomize