I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Randomize
