I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Randomize
