I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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