does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
