so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
