you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
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