i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
