Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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