I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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