Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Randomize
