Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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