I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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