Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
