how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
