508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize