in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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