Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
