So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
