I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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