That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
