He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
You're a waste of cheezeits
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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