Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize