PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
