Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
