Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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