P.S. I can't hear my feet
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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