I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
