It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
two words: eviction party
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
