Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
