he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
