They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Randomize
