We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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