She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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