remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
