Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
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