What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize