their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Randomize