I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
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