D3 body, D1 cock
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
