i don't plan on having that self control this summer
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
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