I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Randomize
